Ask HN: How to get back to life and improve?

1 points by throwawayrp 8 years ago | 4 comments

Hey HN folks!

I could really use some wisdom and advice!

I am going through some rough phase of life. Although, I have a stable job but my personal life is not very stable. I have been in a relationship and then a marriage since last 7 years. Previously, I always worked on side projects apart from my job and was always continuously learning on the side. But since last 7 years I have not done anything except my day job. I don't have anything to show on my Github profile or any side project. I was too emotionally attached in the relationship and it sucked all my time. I wasted too much time in an abusive relationship and got depressed. All my evenings and nights were either spent drinking or slacking time on social feeds, reddit or HN. I lost my ability to focus on anything and it has been a long time I built anything from scratch myself. I never realized that I slowly killed my learning ability.

From the past few months, even though I am trying to get a side project started but I am unable to get anything started.

Has anyone been in a similar state like this before? How did you come out of it?

mch82 8 years ago |

As you're building yourself and your skill back up, think about how you're pacing the goals you set for yourself.

Any chance you enjoy video games like Skyrim or Zelda? Think about how the tasks a character gets start out really simple/short and increase in difficulty/duration over time. The pacing of those tasks is what makes the game fun and addictive to play! If you feel your skills have fallen behind, allow yourself to reset your expectations just like if you started Skyrim over with your character at level 1. Leveling might be frustrating at first, but you'll probably level up faster than you did the first time around and eventually you'll get back to where you were before.

throwawayrp 8 years ago | |

Thanks. I will use your advice!

mch82 8 years ago |

What's your purpose for getting a side project going?

throwawayrp 8 years ago | |

mainly learning and doing something on own. It has been a long time, I haven't personally built anything. My job is not allowing me to expand my skillsets.