<asking for a friend>

Does anyone use a standalone SQL proxy that supports MSSQL? I'm looking for something that can do throttling, load balancing, query filtering, etc. Thus far I have found only one thing in my limited search: SQL Relay (http://sqlrelay.sourceforge.net/index.html)

Anyone have experience with SQL Relay?

The key problem I'm solving is a set of MSSQL DB's that have become brittle bottlenecks for a constellation of apps, and I would like to exert greater control over what's happening on those DB's.

Is there a different way of thinking about this problem?