Ask HN: How to get focused and calm myself before an interview with investors?

6 points by melonbar 5 years ago | 10 comments

So I have been involved in a new startup that has been fortunate enough to land some interviews this past week. We pivoted an MVP and landed customers within a month which was really exciting and it helped us land so some meetings with huge potential. Queue my social anxiety. I tend to ramble and that can lead to me being a bit defensive. I am just curious how others deal with accelerator or VC meetings and more specifically the rapid fire questioning. I love what I do and spend my time trying to ensure our customers are as happy as they can be. I just don’t want to get flustered and ruin things for my partners, if that makes sense. We try not to mock interviews or focus too much on our couple competitors but instead find what our customers want. Thank you so much for making it this far, I greatly appreciate any and all advice.

pbk1 5 years ago |

Look into the TIP[0] skill from dialectical behavior therapy. In particular I've found the cold water triggering a dive response[1] very effective at calming me down when I face acute anxiety.

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dialectical_behavior_therapy#D... [1] https://www.bustle.com/p/what-is-mammalian-diving-response-t...

thiago_fm 5 years ago |

Investors are frequently people with a lot of imperfections, can be assholes, terrible dads/mothers or just happened to be born rich. They are just human beings.

Just talk to them like you typically do to anyone, you need their money, they need you to make money.

And always remember no matter what you do, very little is going to change despite the outcome and you are almost insignificant and is playing a very tiny part in the universe. You are just doing your own thing.

melonbar 5 years ago | |

I needed this. Thank you. It’s been all rah rah on my side of things but I totally agree. I want to make an impact on the world and with this accelerator interview, I have somehow landed a dream come true, but I think my biggest risk is not staying humble and realize that I don’t need to be someone else or waste time worrying about competition. I need to be mean. I need focus on finishing this app with customers at the for-front of my mind. I appreciate you :D

alltakendamned 5 years ago |

Learn breathing patterns (e.g. in yoga).

In essence, making your exhale longer than your inhale will calm you down. So take 10-20 deep breaths through your nose, focus on your breathing by following it, once you're breathing comfortably after the first few, try and make your exhale longer. It's OK to count in your mind if that helps.

melonbar 5 years ago | |

So my partner has been getting really deep into transcendental meditation and it has really been seeming to help with him. I just tonight had him show me some of his methods and just tried to focus and my breathing and I’ll tell ya what, there has been great advice throughout but this has potential for sure. The meeting is soon so I’m going to for sure try breathing deeper. Thanks!

QueensGambit 5 years ago |

If your anxiety steams from the belief that investors are all-knowing people, this might be the time to correct it. You should assume you are more knowledgeable about your customers than investors and teach them what you know and try to learn what you don't know. Think of them as an UI engineer joining your company and how you will explain your server side code to them on their first day at job. Best of luck!

melonbar 5 years ago | |

Wow I never thought of that bust so unique :D thanks for the stellar advice and bon soir!

burntoutfire 5 years ago |

Xanax. Works for me. Although I don't really need sharpening, just calming.

melonbar 5 years ago | |

Sadly I have had great results but in the end have made a conscious decision to avoid benzos, simply too alluring. Thanks for the advice though, definitely a game changer.

burntoutfire 5 years ago | | |

Luckily for me the anxiety is only high just before the high pressure meeting, and I don't have a lot of those (I'm not a founder, just a mere corporate cog), so there's no risk of becoming dependent. A psychiatrist I saw recommended xanax + beta-blocker as a transition tool which will help me gain confidence in these high-stress situations, which should eventually lead to decreased anxiety.