I found my house through 6 degrees of separation

I found my house through 6 degrees of separation(glissblog.vercel.app)

53 points by liamzebedee 3 years ago | 25 comments

alexpotato 3 years ago |

A relative was recounting a story about the training program for people who have recently been promoted to Managing Director at a bank:

"One of the first classes was about how to leverage our social networks.

The instructor gets up and says 'What is something that you are interested in that you have no idea how to make happen?'

Someone raises their hand and says 'My wife really loves Shakira and it would be amazing if she could perform at my wife's birthday.'

Instructor: 'Anyone able to help with this?'

Hand shoots up: 'My old college roommate works for Shakira's manager. I can put you in touch with him' "

I also remember how some of the older social networks (Friendster and A Small World come to mine) would actually show you the "Kevin Bacon hops" between you and any other member. I always thought it was a cool feature although I can also see how it could be abused for Social Engineering.

mongol 3 years ago | |

So what happened? Did Shakira perform at the birthday party?

whywhywouldyou 3 years ago |

This is one of those things that seems interesting/meaningful until you give it more than 10 seconds of thought, and then you realize this is just how life works.

I could whip up an infinite amount of articles explaining how I "Found X through Y degrees of separation", where Y is unexpectedly large. It's trivial to work backwards through your life and reshape everything as a series of coincidences that got you to where you are.

I got my job through 129 degrees of separation! You see, I was born in A, where I went to B school, and met C, who got me interested in D, which led me to discover I had a talent for E, and ... etc etc etc

Maursault 3 years ago | |

Get on any plane in the world, it's pretty unlikely that you know any of the passengers. It turns out to be extremely likely, however, that at least one of the passengers knows someone that you also know.

jareklupinski 3 years ago | | |

funny story: the only time I ever heard "Excuse me, are you jareklupinski?" was while I was looking for my seat on a plane, from a backer of a kickstarter I did years ago :)

kshacker 3 years ago | | |

There was a time, when for 3-4 flights over a couple of years, I would always meet someone I knew, so much so that my pre-teen son (in those days) mentioned it. Does not happen any more though, my streak just ran out :)

But I think if I use your approach, I may always find someone traveling who knows someone that I know.

OJFord 3 years ago | |

Yes exactly, I don't really even see this as an application of the 'n degrees of separation' phrase/principle. Why did OP stop at Felix: who suggested they take the class, or whatever, you can keep going back as you say, the six here is completely arbitrary.

Someone doing something for you whom you met not at birth but after some stuff happened isn't 6 degrees of separation, it's just life.

liamzebedee 3 years ago | | |

The challenge is that you might only need 6 hops to find that person you’re looking for (on average).

liamzebedee 3 years ago | |

> It's trivial to work backwards through your life and reshape everything as a series of coincidences that got you to where you are.

What if you worked forwards based on this idea of coincidence engineering?

rjbwork 3 years ago | | |

Well, now you've got Foundation.

galfarragem 3 years ago | |

There’s even a word for that: serendipity.

liamzebedee 3 years ago | |

Haha congratulations! You got it.

angarg12 3 years ago |

Hey let me tell you how I found one of my jobs!

I just moved to a new room and was speaking spanish on the phone. My new neighbor stopped me and asked if I could help their son to study Spanish. I accepted to do it for free. Since I didn't take a payment, the wife invited me for dinner as payment. During dinner I met the husband, who just happens to be a directive for a local company. After talking, it turns out that they were looking for a programmer. I was also looking for a new job.

Of course this is a pointless anecdote. Rather than individual anecdotes, I prefer to look for a general framework, such as the luck surface area [1].

[1] https://modelthinkers.com/mental-model/surface-area-of-luck

nly 3 years ago | |

It also shows how social capital as a whole plays a role, above and beyond the connections.

You did the wife a favour and the husband did you a favour by putting forward your CV for interview.

I've met a bunch of billionaires in my life through work, but doing so hasn't changed my life one iota. On the other hand, giving up my (unused) dessert spoon on my first date to my (now) partner on our first date after she dropped hers has stuck in her mind and she claims it was one of the small things that contributed in to me getting a second date.

tiborsaas 3 years ago |

This is not really the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon thing. He knew Pete already, so it's a direct referral, how he got to know him is not really interesting. I mean for him it definitely is, but I'm not sure what to get out of this :)

superfrank 3 years ago |

I read a book years ago called "Connected: The Surprising Power of Our Social Networks and How They Shape Our Lives" that talked a lot about this. A lot of opportunities in our lives come from two or three levels out in our social circle. IIRC, the book specifically mentions friends of friends as one of the most common ways to find jobs.

My favorite thing they talked about was how behaviors travel through social circles. A person you may not even know quitting smoking or losing weight could be the catalyst for you doing the same thing.

liamzebedee 3 years ago | |

Thank you for the linkout, I'll put it on my reading list.

netsharc 3 years ago |

Huh, after he concluded the story, it got a bit rambling and pop-philosophical. Featuring that Steve Jobs quote that might as well be printed on wood and be sold as kitsch decoration...

Wahey, it's the season to be nice and jolly!

liamzebedee 3 years ago | |

Haha, well you're right. The point of writing is to think. I never said it was going to be a scientific theory - and really, life is too complex a landscape to build a falsifiable theory anyways. We can still discuss anecdotes though.

MikeDelta 3 years ago |

Everyone in the whole world is separated by a limited number. The notion that everyone is separated by six degrees [0] is apparently considered an urban myth, but social networks seemed to have an average of six jumps to reach everyone else (see link). Curious how it holds up nowadays.

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_degrees_of_separation

shanebellone 3 years ago |

I had an odd experience where I found my last apartment 5 months after receiving a (wrong number) call from the owner. It was a surreal coincidence.

Ekaros 3 years ago |

We actually aren't dealing with whole population of the planet, or even a country. Show the graphs in locations you attempt to connect to are much much denser.