Advice I Wish I Could've Given Myself 5 Years Ago

Advice I Wish I Could've Given Myself 5 Years Ago(viniciusvacanti.com)

132 points by vacanti 13 years ago | 28 comments

mgkimsal 13 years ago |

Would you have listened to yourself or anyone who'd told you that 5 years ago? I've got some people in town that I do some mentoring with, and I've given them most of this list over the last few years, and generally it's ignored. However, I'll get a call, email or coffee with some 'hey - gotta tell you something!'. I listen as they excitedly share some revelation which is pretty much exactly what I'd told them 2 years earlier. I initially took it personally, but I think now it's more a case of "you gotta learn for yourself". As much as people think they can 'crush it' by reading garyv's book, it's not until you're out there living things day to day that most of this stuff is really driven home.

Another thing I've learned is that it's not what you say, but who you are when you say it. Both who you are to yourself, and who/what others perceive you to be when you're saying it.

jlgreco 13 years ago | |

I would say that a message coming from my future sell would probably be treated differently than a message from somebody else in the present. Unfortunately, that "treated differently" would probably involve my past self seeking psychiatric attention.

You could say something to your past self that would verify your identity in an attempt to make your words carry more weight, but I don't think there is much you can do to convince a past self that you were not a figment of their imagination.

zcid 13 years ago | |

When the student is ready, the master appears.

dave_sullivan 13 years ago | |

It's a tough balance--at some level, if you're starting a business, you've got to be pretty stubborn--otherwise you'd just take everyone else's advice and get a job like "everyone else in the world". But you've also got to be flexible and open-minded enough to know when you're wrong, and be able to admit it. And if you want to keep people on your side, give credit where credit is due!

I laughed when you mentioned people not taking advice only to later take the advice but believe they came up with it themselves. It's really annoying when it happens to me, but I've certainly done it myself. I'm not sure why it happens that way exactly, but I try to be aware of it at least and always try to be very gracious for anyone taking the time to offer advice in the first place, whether I take it or not. And later on, when I end up taking the advice anyway, I really do try my best to not believe I came up with it myself.

overgryphon 13 years ago | |

It's hard to give others advice that will help them. You know what you wish you knew 5 years ago, but much of that may be inapplicable to others in a similar position now.

Take the list posted here. It could be terrible advice to a different start-up founder with similar goals if that person already knows how to code, and is working on a product that is more complicated than a 2 week prototype can cover.

mgkimsal 13 years ago | | |

agreed, the 'learn to code' is bad advice for someone who knows how to code. almost self-explanatory, really. but other 'advice' - guidelines, really - that I've doled out has centered around networking and marketing. And I get ignored, in favor of people burying themselves in code and minutia (logo sizings, colors, etc).

But if when FamousPersonX suggests that "you should be networking more, getting feedback, and iterating on smaller offerings of functionality while expanding your network of interested customers", somehow that's revelation from on high, and how insightful that is, and wow... no wonder they're a huge success, etc.

Doesn't even actually mean the people in question follow the advice (generally they don't) but the reaction is annoying.

methodin 13 years ago | |

It's a good point to make. I feel strongly that the people who advance in their lives actually learn something from their mistakes. We are all stubborn to some degree but as long as you can realize when you are wrong and move forward that's all that really matters.

Jun8 13 years ago |

Thing is: I don't think your younger self would have listened to this advice because your mindset is a function of time. I know I wouldn't have. Unless, of course, the advice giver can show you actual proof that the things he's saying are true, e.g. like the Almanac from the future that the older Biff is clutching. Or to show Archimedes how to derive the volume of a sphere using calculus (should you show him how to generalize the formula for a n-dim sphere, maybe not).

So that brings us to the following thought: There are two kinds of advice a time traveler can give: (i) "Objective" stuff that will actually happen, and that perhaps you can provide proof for, i.e. the Instagram advice; and (ii) "subjective" stuff that may or may not turn out that way, i.e. "don't marry that girl".

BTW, due to the Butterfly Effect (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_effect) these two are not as clear cut as above.

itmag 13 years ago | |

I've often wondered if it's possible to actually get to a place where you are receptive to learning from the experiences of others without having to experience the mistakes yourself. Perhaps it's this thing that people call wisdom :)

nrmehta 13 years ago | | |

If my dad were on Hacker News, he'd be all over this. I clearly don't value his advice enough even though it's been pretty dead-on. One thought to add though. I think one problem people have with advice (at least a problem I have with advice) is sometimes, when delivered the wrong way, it oversimplifies the complexity of the situation you're in. You're in a situation and the decision looks hard. And someone comes in and gives you advice which is great but sometimes in the process makes your problem seem simple. If you struggle with a problem that to others seems simple, how do you feel? Answer = dumb. So when I'm asked for advice, I try to keep this in mind - to not minimize the significance or complexity of the person's struggle.

mgarfias 13 years ago |

I would have told myself to divorce the ex then, instead of waiting 5 years and prolonging the misery.

_Lemon_ 13 years ago | |

I was in a similar position with my ex -- although I think I used my start up as an escape putting more time into it than I would have otherwise. Then again, I could just have an addictive personality and it might not have made a blind bit of difference.

Either way, dwelling negatively on the past does not help as you cannot change it. I don't believe I would have come to the same conclusions if I had not experienced it first hand. Remember: work smarter, harder not longer!

StavrosK 13 years ago | |

Well, how would you know?

pclark 13 years ago |

it's really challenging to give any advice that i would follow without having walked the path to have came to that conclusion. thusly, it'd be things where time = output. such as taking up pilates, playing more golf, waking up earlier.

my favourite high level advice is: the best time to plant a tree was 5 years ago, the second best time is today.

dave_sullivan 13 years ago |

This is good advice.

I started out on my own startup path almost 2 years ago now, and it's dawned on me by now that things don't change. If you're building a company (or anything worth building really), you will always have problems, they will often catch you by surprise, and imminent success or failure always seems like it's right around the corner.

Best case scenario, you get to deal with higher quality problems, make more money, and still love what you do. Worst case... well, I guess you go get a job (and/or go bankrupt?)

krupan 13 years ago |

I thought he was going to say, "sell your house, now!"

umsm 13 years ago | |

Right now may be the best time to buy your first house

sukuriant 13 years ago | | |

5 years ago may not have been. That might have been the joke.

Nursie 13 years ago |

Wait for global financial crisis. Sink all available money into apple stock at $82 in January '09 and hang onto it for three years.

Hindsight is always 20/20...

SinFulNard 13 years ago |

This is so timely and poignant its almost as though it was written just for me!

AznHisoka 13 years ago |

How is that Yippit doing?

theorique 13 years ago | |

The article suggests: "We’re now 25 people, raised $7.3 million, and just had our best month ever."

AznHisoka 13 years ago | | |

I know, but 2 out of the 3 is vanity stats. They had their best month ever, why not put numbers on that figure versus # of employees or funding.

praveenhm 13 years ago |

wonderful!!

codegeek 13 years ago |

Good advice. The last point is terrific.

Ataub24 13 years ago |

This is a must read.