Your idea sounds cool, but then I’d have to learn Morse code which doesn’t sound fun to me

I publish CBC and BBC News Feeds in Morse Code in various speeds if you're looking for another way to learn Morse Code.

So anyway, if you want to do something like that, it's back to android I'm afraid. Don't worry, there's no patent and there's prior art (i.e. my usage). FWIW - the closest patent to it was made by a TV manufacturer that would allow you to find the remote control by playing a noise etc directed by the TV !

iOS supports having notification sounds synchronized with the haptics; I wonder if generating the text tones as audio files and assigning those would have been an easier approach.

Just have to use the share sheet on an audio file and choose "Use as ringtone". Shortcuts/Automator might even be able to make this automagic.

But would be cool with a separate buzzer of sorts where you get the normal buzzer notification and then hold a finger somewhere specific and get details that way.