The Hidden Costs of Starting a Company(boss.blogs.nytimes.com) |
The Hidden Costs of Starting a Company(boss.blogs.nytimes.com) |
Most people work harder than they want to and must make trade-offs. People with minimum wage jobs. Doctors, lawyers -- as others have mentioned. Pretty much everyone except the idle wealthy or unemployed.
Pretty much everyone alive thinks they work too hard and wish they could spend more time with friends and family or working on hobbies, travelling, etc. Human condition.
Having a startup is certainly hard work for less pay than you might be making elsewhere. But you get all of the benefits of being your own boss to one degree or another, plus creating something from scratch, and the possible upside.
I knew a guy who opened a lunch restaurant and catering business, and until it was making enough money, he'd work 6 days a week at the restaurant for lunch and catering gigs, and then also waited tables at a friend's restaurant and worked as a bartender at another friend's place. He basically got 4 hours of sleep a night, 7 days a week for three years. There was no brass ring or huge exit at the end of that path, he'd just decided at some point that he wanted to be his own boss.
And then there's all the people out there who work two or three part-time jobs just to make ends meet, who never see their kids, who may not even have health insurance - where's their work/life balance?
I personally feel privileged to have had the opportunity to start a company, make some money, have health insurance, and yes, worked my fair share of 60-hour weeks and all-nighters. I'm way better off than so many people in the US, forget about the rest of the world.
I think that sentiment is summed up nicely in this comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5810546
"The dream we sell to our employees" -- a clear delineation of "the powerful and right founders vs. lowly employees who have to be manipulated." "Join our ranks" -- What? What ranks?
People who live charmed lives can't really understand the real world after a while. It's not their fault, and in a way, the world may be better because of it, but it's annoying when they unknowingly flaunt their "We're successful!" in our faces.
Startups are tough. As founders we are responsible for our teams, our customers, our vendors and partners, our advisory boards, our investors, family, friends, significant others, our health, and vision. It's not a compliant. I could go make a ton of money working a 9-5 without any of this type of stress and I choose not to because I love what I do and I love to build.
The reason I mentioned Startups Anonymous is because it's a resource for founders and team members (I don't like the word employees it creates that separation you noted above).
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Am I alone?
There's a lot of evidence showing that working more than 40 hours a week is counterproductive for employees, and results in negative productivity after a couple of weeks. I don't know why running a startup should be any different.
There are lots of occupations that can be demanding and stressful (doctor, lawyer, investment banker, etc.). Why is it a surprise to anyone that a career requiring a significant commitment of one's time leaves less time for other activities?
There are only 24 hours in a day and if you're ultimately not happy with how you're using them, the solution is to change how you're using them, not to spend time complaining or lamenting what you've chosen to give up.
Success means the freedom to use your time as you prefer, but there's no guarantee of success. The alternative is status-quo drudgery.
Of course, there are sacrifices to be made. But ultimately, it's about priorities. If your startup is SO important that you're losing your health or your marriage, then there's something wrong with how you're prioritizing. The startup can still get MOST of your time (like any career), but without ruining you.
Huh? What kind of friend tosses you aside because you decide to start a company? That makes absolutely no sense. I'm trying to imagine this conversation:
You: I'm starting my own company!
Friend: I think that's a crazy idea. You'll probably fail.
You: I'm confident I can do it.
Friend: I disagree, and we're not friends any more.
If anything, friends usually way underestimate the difficulty of running a business and just throw platitudes at you like, "Do it! Follow your dreams! With passion you can't fail!"
I like the conversation you created though. It actually would have been easier if your comments were true.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Variety is good for the brain.
Yes I'm sure you're addicted to the hedonic treadmill of your b2c webapp idea (ok, some folks are b2b, and some folks are doing things that aren't webapp). Recognize it, and manage it. Cognitive variety is healthy.
Ask yourself this: once you're professionally accomplished and have nothing to prove, what will you be focusing on professionally and how will you juggle various priorities.
Now ask yourself: why aren't you doing that already. Go do that. Unless its a bizarre fantasy that isn't possible in reality.
:-)
Choices involving time allocation don't have to be binary; each one carries an opportunity cost, the granularity of which we control. Although I can relate to many negatives from the article, it strikes me as equivalent to complaining about a cushy-but-boring day job while not willing to incur the risks of self-employment.
The meat of the issue is to decide what the right balance is, to be aware of the trade-offs, and to not vilify 'startups' and blame them for our failure to make choices consistent with our values.
"You know where you got that shirt!" - Charlie Murphy
Firstly you have to start spending quality time, and that means cutting off lots of the things you do at work that are only there to satisfy your need to feel like you are accomplishing things. You aren't. Quality time is true for family, and friend hours as well; just because you are there does not mean you are there. Many people who saw their parents regularly still feel they were very distant from them. If you are at home, be there mentally. If you are working, close that email window, and work.
Secondly make more time by waking up earlier in the day. If you wake up at 6, you can go to bed at 10:45, and that leaves you with 16 hours to do your magic.
Thirdly, stop being reactionary. If you have a plan other than the no-plan plan (translation "i don't know what to do so I am doing anything that comes to mind"), then you will know you can execute on it without having to spend 16 hours on it daily. While it is entirely understandable to work extremely long hours every now and then, it is probably more viable over the long term to have a plan and execute on it at your own pace. The things we will change the course of our startup (e.g. "we have to launch before July 7th") won't change them at all, besides if your startup is one event away from failure, even if it is Google launching a similar product, then it is safe to say it should not be called a business.
Kick back. Write a plan. Execute it.
I feel like the current balance has gone much too far into the startup direction and I've been waiting for some time for the pendulum to swing back.
Actually, a wise philosopher named Jennifer Lopez (yep, J-Lo) said that first. Her quotation (paraphrasing here) was something to the effect of: "You can have a great career, a great relationship with your partner, or be a great parent. Pick any two."
Meh. OK, yes, doing a startup can be a difficult process, and you probably have to make some serious sacrifices if you want to succeed. That's not a big revelation.
In my own case, I've basically forgone social interaction, dating, spending time with friends, etc., in order to try and get this thing off the ground. No, it's not pleasant, but I remind myself that this state of affairs is (if things go well) temporary... we'll get some traction at some point, and I may be able to back off a little. One day, we'll be a profitable, growing company, we'll hire a CEO, and I'll designate myself "chief coffee mug washer" and step aside to spend time doing fun stuff. Maybe some of my friends will still be alive then, and still know who I am. And maybe I'll still be young enough to have some kind of chance of finding a girlfriend. Or not. Who knows? But who ever said any of this was going to be easy?
Winning isn't normal, right?[1]
I guess you could say I'm an adherent of the mindset that "startups are the new graduate school". I love learning new stuff and forcing myself to learn what I need to know to do this startup is a great experience in many ways.
But like everything in life, there are always tradeoffs.
Participating in start-ups (as a founder or employee) is not something that's out of your control, despite your description of yourself as a "type A personality." It's just not. You do it out of passion. You do it out of a desire to build your own thing and make a more profound dent in the universe (and maybe get a little payday in the process). That's great -- and I respect that. You should be doing it with a sober mind and a clear picture of what you're doing and what your goals are.
But when you paint being a start-up founder as being similar to having a drug or alcohol addiction -- as being something that you can't control and that ruins your life. Well, it kind of sounds like whining. Or like you're trying to paint yourself as some kind of martyr to the cause. Like something is being put upon you that's totally out of your control and it's ruining your life. It's not. You are given an option each evening: Stay at work or go visit friends you haven't seen in ages. You think it over and choose the reward that comes from work. Want closer friends? Choose them.
You're in control. It's disingenuous to act otherwise.
The pressure (whether self-imposed or not) upon founders (especially those who have raised funds) are not imagined. The expectation and pressure to deliver a result when you've got investors, employees, shareholders etc all looking at you to pull this off are huge.
"You do it out of passion. You do it out of a desire to build your own thing and make a more profound dent in the universe"
No, unfortunately that isn't why a lot of struggling founders are doing it anymore. That's why you started it. Ideally why you started, and why you're continuing should stay the same, but unfortunately, more often than not, the reason you start a startup, and the reason you persist when things get bad (and Startups Anonymous and blog posts like these enter the discussion), are entirely different.
"You think it over and choose the reward that comes from work."
You assume the choice is based on wanting the reward that comes from work. It isn't that calculated. It is survival. Fuck friends, they'll be there tomorrow, tonight I have to work out how to stem the haemorrhage of money so I don't have to let Bob go on Friday; or, we've only got three months of money left, and our revenue is no where near where it should be, lets work these numbers in Excel for another couple of hours, there has to be something I'm missing.
This becomes a viscous cycle, and your ability to execute gets more and more constrained as you get more and more fatigued, stressed, tunnel visioned etc. As your ability to execute decreases your stresses go up, and each compound the other.
Tell me how exactly at that point, an exhausted, stressed, emotional person is supposed to just have a moment of self realisation and go "oh wait, what I'm doing is destructive, is actually making the situation worse, and I should JUST STOP". (Which by the way is what I've heard many people tell alcoholics who don't understand the disease).
The mental health aspects of startup imbalance (whether self imposed or not) are real. The fact that they may be originally self imposed in no way minimises the pain and suffering that a lot of founders go through.
Having a group of people who you can share with, hear other's stories, hear how they turned it around helps you. The word play is apt, well done, and shows a deeper appreciation for the issue than I think you're seeing.
This thread's probably dead, but I wanted to add a few more cents, here...
I hear what you're saying, and I have my own business, so trust me -- I understand much of what you describe. Please don't automatically assume I know nothing about this.
At one point, I was an exhausted, stressed, and emotional person. And I had a moment self-realization and I said "stop." I thought deeply about how I worked and why and begin to make changes to create a more sustainable work-life balance. It took some effort, but I enacted most of those changes. Although it's an ongoing process.
I have never been an alcoholic, but I have been close to alcoholics. What they went through is nothing at all like what I went through. Once I made my decision, I had the power to enact change. My understanding is that managing alcoholism is a very hard process that pretty much requires community and accountability to work.
Now, I don't dismiss at all people getting together, talking, and helping one another out. I didn't do anything like "Startups Anonymous," but I did find that I was able to reach out to people I knew and find some help.
What I get frustrated by, though, is a much more subtle tone that I hear when founders and entrepreneurs talk about their problems. It's a little hard to describe, exactly, and I don't want to be either dismissive of rude. But. I feel like I hear too much pained moaning about a loss of friends, relationship difficulties, and loss of pleasures like taking vacations that don't require packing a laptop. Things like that. This bothers me because I actually think that just taking a deep breath and going, "You know what, I've simply got to stop what I'm working on for a day and just go do something else, something different -- just for a day (hour/evening/weekend)" is totally possible, no matter how myopically stressed you may be. In fact, I've found that when I most stressed, taking these breaks and enjoying life -- in the middle of the stressful period -- helps me keep the stresses in context, helps me not let them invade my every neuron and eat my brain out from the inside. It frees my mind to actually think about the stressful thing without falling into a dark hole.
So what I'm saying is, don't blame your company, your co-founders, your investors, your employees, or your customers for these problems. You. Are. In. Control. Act like it. It's not a pity party. Nobody who relies on you wants you to be a friendless basket-case. And suffering isn't a requirement for creating something great.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It's great to hear a different perspective. Lots of luck to you and whatever you're working on.
I guess I was talking about the more serious, and thankfully less common, degree it can get to with some founders (anyone actually, this isn't a special club reserved only for founders, anyone can find themselves in a bad way, feeling trapped).
The 90% (pulling figures out of my arse) of founders who say they have no choice but to take their laptop on every 2 day holiday, and haven't had a decent break for years are probable self inflicted with ample ability to "just change it" - agreed.