Exact same thing happened to me. Also a developer, also struggled in Germany, always wanted more and needed a challenge.

Let me tell you how things progressed for me going downhill from where you are now. The boredom transformed into depression. The depression into anxiety. The anxiety into constant panic attacks. I was not able to leave the house and go to the office. I was under the constant impression death was around the corner, I was having pain all over my body. I struggled like that for 2 years.

I ended up in a hospital twice, they were constantly telling me nothing's wrong with me. And then I knew something has to change.

I packed my stuff and left. Started seeing a professional and after maybe two months I was back on my feet. She helped me get rid of the panic and anxiety.

Still afraid to get back to work, I took another year and just did whatever the hell I wanted. Traveled a lot, slept like crazy, spent time with friends. Even did a bit of work, but only on my projects, and always being careful of how hard I push myself.

Fast forward 3 years. I am back on track with my life and career. I am freelancig now, working on my own stuff, and consulting.

What I learned in the last years:

A job is not something worth killing yourself over. Yes, some people do a 9-5 mediocre job, but I can't change them.

Divide the work/personal life with a thick line. Find a good balance between the two.

Stop trying to make millions with my next big startup, and just have fun going forward. Things will happen on their own.

Connect with people like me.

Be really really pragmatic when it comes to my job. Avoid bringing in emotions and avoid pushing too hard.

That being said, take care of yourself. Don't let it go downhill, the sooner you fix it the better. There's a fix for you, no worries, just have to find it

Remember one thing: You can't do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.

user:	vlladin
created:	July 28, 2015
karma:	3